Types of Parenting

Written by Bruce Hughes on . Posted in Family

Parents have a huge impact on their children’s lives. Many of them may not realize just how important and how great the influence they can exercise upon them is. There are four major types of parenting which have been first introduced by Dr. Diane Baumrind. These types of parenting consist of various types of responses towards a child’s behavior. Your child’s behavior is directly influenced by your behavior towards the child, by your type of response in answer to the child’s actions.

Thus, studying the central traits of your parenting style can help determine the way the child’s behavior is affected by yours. However a parent chooses to act, speak, to  interact with someone else or with the child largely impacts the development of the child, since the moment they are born. In her research, through naturalistic observation, parenting interviews and other methods used in this type of researches, psychologist Diana Baumrind has found that there are four main types of parenting:

  • Authoritative: parents who exercise this type of parenting are forgiving, attentive, teach their child what proper behavior means and they also enforce a set of rules, and if the child does not follow their rules, they are punished, and in case the child follows their rules they are rewarded. This is the most balanced type among the four types of parenting found by Dr. Diane Baumrind.
  • Authoritarian: this type of parent has high expectations from the child but does not communicate enough with the child. This parent sets rules and limits but does not explain why the child should not act that way; the parent does not offer any logical reasoning for the rules and limits imposed. These parents are also known to enforce harsh punishments.
  • Permissive: This is one of the types of parenting that is not highly recommended. The parents become more friends with their child rather than parents and do not have any expectations from them; they also allow the child to make their own decisions, which is not always the best way to teach your child a lesson.
  • Uninvolved: these parents neglect their child by putting themselves first instead of putting their child’s life first. They offer their child the basic needs but they do not interact enough with the child. They are uninvolved in their child’s life.

Dr. Diane Baumrind discovered that the most ideal and balanced of the types of parenting  is the  Authoritative style. This parenting style leads to an independent, mature and socially accountable child. At the opposite end is the Uninvolved style, which often leads to children turning into delinquents.

How to Communicate with Teenagers

Written by Bruce Hughes on . Posted in Family

If you are having troubles with your teenage children, you have come to the right place. We have some great ideas on how to communicate with teenagers better. Teenagers can be really difficult to deal with, but try to understand them because even though you may not believe it, it is as difficult for them as it is for you. You were once a teenager yourself, so perhaps you should think about that the next time you are about to engage in a conversation with your teenage child.

The secret to get your children’s attention is by paying attention to them and trying to understand them, even though you may not like the situation or if you do not agree with them, or even if you do not understand what they are talking to you about. Remember, you have different points of view, and what may be important and threatening to their future, for them it may seem unimportant at that moment, and on the contrary, something that may seem totally unimportant to you, could affect them greatly. Also, keep in mind that at this age, their hormones are just really unstable and they can easily get offended and angry. Moreover, you live in two different worlds, even if you are not aware of it and even if it is not true in fact, you actually are living in two different worlds and between these worlds there is a gap even bigger than Marianas Trench.

So, the best advice on how to communicate with teenagers would be to try to put yourself, your younger self in their place and just offer them all the support they need, even though you think they are not at all entitled to have it. Getting your children’s trust is the best thing you can do for your relationship with them. If you want them to change something, you need to put yourself into their shoes, before offering them any advice, or mainly giving them an order. Let us recognize it – we are actually trying to give them orders, without even explaining why it is wrong to act that way or to do that thing.

Finally, it is difficult to know how to communicate with teenagers, but remember to stay calm and to not get angry too fast or preferably at all, if you can. Maintaining calm is an essential aspect when dealing with your teenager. Therefore, your job is to help lead them towards making better choice, so in the future, they will be able to make good choices without your help. In achieving this, you may at some point have to let them decide and even though it will not be the right choice, you need to let them do it and assume its responsibility and learn the consequences of their actions on their own.